so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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