My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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