Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I enjoy the company of your penis
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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