Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
