Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize
