I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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