He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
