the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I am available for nakedness
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
