he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
