i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
