Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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