Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize