I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
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