I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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