All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Help. Why am I so naked?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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