My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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