So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Who died my cat blue again?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
