Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
