when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
