fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
