Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
what the fuck happened to the tacos
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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