what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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