Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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