Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
she looked like the before picture.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize