I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
