16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I did not marry a roomba.
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