i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Randomize
