in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
