I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
