hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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