I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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