Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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