Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
