After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She announced her abortion via fbk
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
