love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
