O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
