And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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