is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
