why do cheetos always look like penises
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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