my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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