I am in a vortex of obligation.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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