i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize