yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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