don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
