I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Just invented taco cereal.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
