Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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