Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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