Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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