I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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