Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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