i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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